paris
I thought that I'd have time to write a blog about Dublin, Puerto Banus, and London this week but I guess I was being overly optimistic. I'm off to Paris tomorrow so you'll get a four-city blog upon my return on Tuesday...
finally - a decision
Just a few minutes ago I accepted a job offer and am now thinking 'What the hell am I doing?'
the new self expressed
Welcome to the (sort of) new look for self expressed.
I've been playing around with some thoughts about layout etc but nothing really materialised - not yet, anyway. So for now, I thought it would be nice to subtly change the look of the site as I head in a new direction in my life, having sat the last of my academic exams and now am making decisions about my future and career.
I hope that the site is as interesting as the old one, and perhaps a bit more streamlined, but with new additions here and there - and more to be added as time presses on.
Yes, I am back from Dublin and Puerto Banus (although I really wish I wasn't). I am momentarily busy being lazy but will get back to you with a proper post shortly...
the final stretch
Monday. Principles of Statistical Analysis exam - three hours of hell, undoubtedly.
Tuesday. Back to the guillotine, in the form of another three hours of hell, a.k.a. Further Statistical Methodology exam. At 17:30 I will be a free woman! Overnight at Gatwick. Prepare for interview.
Wednesday. Fly to Dublin in the morning. Job interview in the afternoon. Fly back to London in the evening. Overnight at Gatwick.
Thursday. Meet D at Gatwick for flight to Malaga. Drive to Puerto Banus.
Friday - Tuesday. Sun, shopping, beach, etc. Back to London/Oxford on Tuesday.
I think that this week will shape up to be my third (fourth? fifth?) busiest week in a row. A few days ago I purchased a map of Dublin - I've never been, and the only reason why I am fortunate enough to go is because the company interviewing me paid for my flight as well as my transportation arrangements whilst there. I am both dreading my visit, as well as well as looking forward to it. As for the exams - if the ones last year are anything to go by, I probably won't fail, but I probably also won't do spectacularly. It doesn't matter: I am too burnt out at this point to do anything about it. I am in desperate need of a holiday.
a bit of good news, part (ii)
I woke up to another job offer, this one from the video conference interview.
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
a bit of good news, part (i)
Last night I was given a job offer for a position that I was referred to, and not formally interviewed for. The conversation went something like 'We like you, we don't need to interview you further, we're going to create a job description and offer for you'.
Erm...WOW...gee...thanks!
I'm thrilled, but still in a bit of a shock as I was not expecting the call, never mind for the call to have gone like that. Will I accept the offer? I'm not sure yet, as it depends very much on the job description amongst other things. I've never liked the thought of having only one offer to choose from, so I will be spending the next while hopefully accumulating some more (I currently have two). I am waiting for the results of the video conference interview held last week (also for a company in Bermuda) as well as getting the ball rolling with a (Bermudian) company who would like me to attend an interview with them in Dublin, possibly before I go to Spain late next week. This is all (tentatively) due to take place before next Thursday, and no I haven't forgotten that I have exams on Monday and Tuesday. I could be wrong, but I think that I might have a busy week next week.
I know that I should sound happier, and perhaps this is due to the eternal pessimist in me, but until I sign an offer letter I'll still feel like I'm standing blind at the edge of a cliff. But that's the way life goes, right?
when it rains...
...it pours. And does it ever.
I feel like some higher power is giving me a test - testing my ability to get through these final weeks leading up to my exams. I don't think I have ever had a worse two weeks than this. My actuarial exam last week was average at best - I do have a decent chance of doing better than I thought, but I don't like feeling so 'on the fence' about it. Now I have to sit and wait (and I hate waiting) for the results to be released. A day after my exam I had an intensive week-long university assessment due. How I managed to sit an actuarial exam
and get that nightmare of an assignment completed merely a day apart, I have no idea. Let's just say that it probably didn't exactly involve much sleep.
It shocks me a little to say this, but my final Oxford exams are being sat in just over a week's time. I feel as though I know
nothing. I haven't got a single formula or concept memorised. The amount of material that we are required to know is absolutely astounding that I am merely trying to get through it all once, never mind understand any of it. I reckon that it's my own bloody fault for not starting the revision earlier, but at the same time, to expect us to know that much is insanity. It is simply not possible. I'm being pushed to the limit and perhaps this is a test on more than one level: mentally, psychologically, and physically. I don't think I've slept well for over a month with everything floating around in my mind. (I've also managed, on top of everything else, to convince myself that I am going to fail my exams, and hence will not be able to graduate.) At the beginning of the week I was called for a job interview; two days later I was called again for a second-round interview (it happened today in London); and when I got home this evening I received an email from yet another company wanting to interview me -
four days from now. I suppose I ought to be pleased about this. Don't get me wrong, for indeed I am - it just couldn't have come at a worse time.
This week my body gave up on me and broke out into hives, the same sort that I had (only much worse last time) in November, as a result of (presumably and unsurprisingly) stress. They've calmed down now but I'm keeping a nervous watch on them. It's the last thing that I want to deal with right now but it's a vicious cycle really - the more stress I have, the more my body reacts, and the worse it gets.
I know that I must sound
exceedingly dull these days. But I shall endeavour to do this: when I'm finished with all of my work, at some point or another, I am going to go out and get completely, totally, utterly, absolutely, and fabulously smashed. This isn't a promise of course, but I might have some better stories to tell afterwards...
